If anyone asks, I was with you the whole time...
Huh. Didn’t see that one coming. Fic Updates.

Greencard marriage broke 17k. That’s about 2000 more words than I expected in the last 2 days. I can also safely say that it’s not gonna end at 20k. Probably not 25k. There’s a lot of emotional and plotty meat to go and it ties into canon events as well. So this could be fun!

Quick Summary: Due to circumstances of his birth, someone has dug up a technicality about Phil Coulson’s US Citizen Status. His security Clearance, His Parent’s history and a few other things make a simple fix next to impossible. Also, they’re really sure it wasn’t just bad timing.

What’s interesting is that some of the themes and specific ideas were cannibalized from the first fic I put words to page to in what I call my Second Great Fanfic Word Explosion. I really wanted to finish it, but at 8k it was really patchy and missing something that I’m not sure I could have put back in. So in a lot of ways this is a rewrite, but only of one Plot, the B plot is all brand new. There’s a scene, in the old one where they’re Making Out As A Super Spy Cover and they’re both super touch starved and there’s accidental orgasms for everyone one, that I might separate out and use all on its own.

Right now I’m really happy with the current story line. It’s an exploration of Asexuality and Demisexuality that I haven’t seen in fandom yet. I’m not saying that anyone has done it wrong, just that there’s a huge spectrum and it’s only just beginning to be explored.

Just the Once (probably now and forever being renamed as Fidelity) That one is over 15k at the moment, but unlike Greencard Marriage, I have a much firmer grasp of how I’m getting from A to B to C. I may pick that one up this week as the meds change wipes me out.

Quick Summary: Clint is getting a HUGE promotion, on the eve of his leaving for an 18 month tour of duty, he and Phil say good bye to each other. It’s supposed to be a hug, it ends up being a lot more. They still leave each other in the morning, but as time goes on, they realize goodbye isn’t really an option.

The thing I really like about this one is their relationship dynamic. It’s one of those ‘impossible situations’ that they resolve to make possible in the most sweet way. There’s a very early moment that I wrote and then stepped back and just… adored. Phil Coulson sat up and knocked Clint on his ass in the most beautiful way possible and that’s when I went from liking the story to falling in love with it.

It’s the Landing (AKA Oops II, sequel to It’s Not the Fall) This one stalled a bit, I needed a break from the universe. So right now it’s one Chapter long. But it has priority status for whenever I finish one of the two above. I’m already feeling good about it again. So no worries, the sequel is well on its way.

Quick Summary: Decisions are easy, consequences are not. Phil has made his choice and he’s not gonna change his mind. But that doesn’t mean that everything suddenly gets easier. His behavior is being questioned, there’s internal politics, well meaning friends and colleagues and a whole lot of Phil Coulson trying to find a purchase on his new life. Sometimes he’s forced to take a step before he finds one.

The response to the first story still keeps me in awe every time I think about it. It’s amazing. And every time I pick over Oops1 to grab all the stuff I put in there to deal with later in OopsII so the plot points connect perfectly, I get all giddy and giggly. I think when I get back to this I’m gonna really enjoy writing all of Phil and Clint’s firsts. There’s so much to explore and it’s all the kind of stuff I really love about writing.

Shorts: Crisis and Messy. They both have half finished parts and ideas. Probably will appear when I need breaks from the longer fic.

Crisis moves on to dealing with healing when your partner must take care of their own life at the same time.

Messy has the potential for a really big plot. I’m less sure what’ll come out of this series next, but I have some ideas.


Greencard Marriage (working title, probably end up as Arranged) - Currently over 15k. Poor Phil. He’s got a super long journey ahead. Take a double 6 b/c I wrote so much this week.

“No,” Phil clips out immediately, he’s not. “I’m just, I haven’t…” he sighs and curses. “Fuck it, where do I put…

Reblog for the AM.

Sunday Six

Greencard Marriage (working title, probably end up as Arranged) - Currently over 15k. Poor Phil. He’s got a super long journey ahead. Take a double 6 b/c I wrote so much this week.

“No,” Phil clips out immediately, he’s not. “I’m just, I haven’t…” he sighs and curses. “Fuck it, where do I put my hands?”

Clint’s chest rumbles through his thin shirt and Phil likes the sensation.

“We are kinda of twisted around here, hold on,” Clint says and then he gently rearranges them so that Phil’s head is tucked into his neck, his arms wrapped comfortably around Clint’s body, both arms under Clint’s, almost snug into his armpits. Clint’s fingers stroke his hair and the warmth of his body sinks into Phil relaxing his muscles into something pliable and content. “Better?” Clint asks, muffled by his own position, half smooshed into Phil’s temple.

Phil hums a yes and concentrates on the body under his hands. Clint’s back is just as muscular as the rest of him, but it’s still somehow smooth, almost sensual. There’s a natural slope and curve to how is muscles piece together and it feels good under his fingers.

He doesn’t remember hugs feeling like this. Comfortable, easy, no negotiation needed. Phil trusts that Clint knows that this hug is just what it is, a hug. Not an invitation or a segue or a means to an end. Well, maybe a little means to an end, Phil can’t deny that a good hug apparently has its own rewards.

People who ban books think they’re showing moral backbone and superiority.

Most everyone else outside the decision sees fear. Fear that their living model can’t stand any scrutiny, any questions. Fear that ideas are dangerous because it might convince a child that you are wrong and that you’ll never be able to sway them back.

Well, I hate to break it to you, but your children already think you’re wrong. There will always be times when they hate you, when they question you, when they seek to experience things that you haven’t given them, either by choice, rule or simply fate.

But chances are, if you’re part of a community that bans books and ideas, your children have simply learned to be better secret keepers. They’ve learned to covet and hide their disagreements and questions. They’ve learned to ask in other ways and places. They’ve learned that at 18, they’re no longer beholden to you. They’ve learned that when they grow up, they can’t rely on you, because your help comes with conditions. Conditions they’re not willing to take.

"Why do my kids never talk to me?"

Because they’ve learned there’s no point.

Every time I see a banned book list, I read through the ‘reasons’ and go:

"Shakespeare, Shakespeare, Shakespeare, double Shakespeare, aaaaand Shakespeare with a side of Homer."

Honestly, if you’re gonna let those dick joke filled, british/french sexual farce inspiring, GHOST STORIES WITH WITCHES AND FORTUNE TELLING, getting married at FOURTEEN, with not just suicidal ideations, but actualfax SUICIDE, not only into the classroom, but up onto a pedestal of Great Literature, then maybe you shouldn’t be banning books based on the same ‘themes’,

Shakespeare was the fucking ‘popular culture’ of his time, so to allow him but disallow fiction that’s popular with the masses that contains the same ‘mature themes’ mostly makes you sound hugely uninformed. And that’s only to start with.

Modern technological changes.

I’ve just about remembered to add on an extra 30 minutes to relogin to all of the apps when I upgrade a device, but I keep forgetting I’m gonna be re-pairing with every blue tooth device I come across for weeks.

*le sigh*

Fic writing update! Greencard Marriage (YAY TROPES!) broke 14k AND I’m fairly sure I spent 800 words on a single hug.



In the last few days TWO gif sets have been going around, summarizing, fairly well, two speeches/pleas in front of international communities and committees.

Both of these speeches are being given by famous actors. They are both well versed in their topic and incredibly articulate.

1. is Leonardo DiCaprio talking about climate change 

2. is Emma Watson (Hermione), talking about feminism 

Feel free to pause and look them up if you like, they’re both pretty good.

Now. Guess in which one’s subsequent reblogs and comments people are asking what this person’s qualifications are to talk about their topic. Guess which one has people dismissing it because it’s another entitled famous person expecting people to bow down to their opinions.

ANSWER:  If you answered Emma Watson, you would be right.

Which is hilarious because ignoring any and all degrees and education she MIGHT have, growing up famous, female and a movie star is plenty in qualifications. In fact, I’d say having even TWO of those would be plenty. In some cases, one.

But she’s also got an undergrad degree in political science  and graduated something like cum laude from a very prestigious university.

If you’re still not convinced that feminism is still an incredibly important movement, I don’t even know what to say to you.

Research help needed




Anyone from the NY city area around? I’m not even from the US, so I wondered what supermarket/grocery store Clint Barton might shop at. Nothing posh, but a place that sells both name brand and off brand things and fresh produce.

Hey, all! Help a writer out? (This is my lovely beta and wonderful friend)

might be able to help!

The other replies aren’t WRONG per se, but they don’t take into account a few things. A lot depends on where you have Clint living and if he a car. ALSO, if this takes place within the last 8 years or so, he might even use a grocery delivery service. They spread through NY very quickly and while parts of brooklyn and queens got it last, they’re still really convenient and about average in terms of pricing. I can see him using them if he’s really injured etc.

For instance, the person who answered about about d’agastino etc, has a very Manhattan bent to their answers. And if you have Clint living in the villiage or someplace else that doesn’t cost 1.5 million or $3000/month in rent, there are different options than for those neighborhoods.

616 Clint currently lives in Bedstuy Brooklyn, but you can feel free to change that.

As for corner stores and bodegas, if he’s looking not to spend an arm and a leg, he’d be pretty picky about them. But if he’s living in Brooklyn, he’s more likely to wander into small grocery stores that carry VERY local foodstuffs as well as regular foodstuffs. Ex: When I lived in Brooklyn there was a place that had a local brand of perogi for sale. It was a very small company and had a russian flare to it.

So I guess my answer is:

1. What’s the year?

2. What borough does he live in?

3. Have you narrowed it down to a specific PART of a certain borough, b/c that also changes stuff a little.

4. Does he own a car? Does his motorcycle allow for shopping bags?

And any other vital stats you have.


That sinking feeling that if you’re really going to give it a go as a professional writer you may have to learn to live with doing most of your writing after being awake for 18 hours. 1AM - 4AM is apparently and consistently my most productive hours.

Sunday Six

Working Title: Arrangement (This is the green card marriage fic) - Just popped 10k, but my writing groove is back so YAY! This one easily has another 10k in it.

“Do you want things like that?” Clint asks, his hand is still waiting, he doesn’t seem concerned about it.

“Yes,” the word is ripped from Phil’s throat. He likes all of it and more. He thinks about late night movies and shared popcorn and maybe pressing together under a blanket and staring up at the stars and a thousand other things, but everyone always expects more, usually when Phil is least expecting it.

His hand is moving before he realizes it, Phil stops it before it can get further than his own silverware. “So,” he says carefully, “you really want to marry me?”

Clint’s face pinks up a bit and he takes a deliberate bite of his lamb lollipop using his free hand. “Honestly? The marriage thing is freaking me out too.” His lips are shiny with grease and then Clint licks them clean and still the way the low light reflects off them intrigues Phil. “I did it once, with less lead time too, and it basically ended in fire and brimstone, so yeah, I have reservations. But you don’t deserved to get jerked around like that and I’d…” his eyes flick away briefly, “I’d miss you, a lot. And that’s enough for me to try and keep you around.”

iOS 8

Early times but so far there are a bunch of little changes that I actually like. There’s about 800% more control over sending data from one app to another (like Evernote and pocket) they keyboard has active suggestions now instead of in a bubble over the typing.

But I know what you all want to know.

The new tumblr app upgrade for iOS LOADS IMAGES FAST. LIKE. SO FAST.

More later.

Close various apps on laptop so she can go to sleep, trip and accidentally add 400 words to fic.

     -An Insomniac’s Confused Confession


iOS8 takes up somewhere between 4 and 5 gigs of memory and I’m 99% sure that’s not taken into account when labeling their devices. Buying the previous generation is cheaper, but it’s probably not a good idea to go for the 8 gig models anymore. B/C you can’t choose which iOS to update to and eventually iTunes will start bugging you about it. Also I’d bet the App Store will eventually start bugging you too.

 …my dad is attempting to pin me down for a heart to heart “how are you doing with your issues is there anything I can do to help?” talk and I am like “UH! SORRY! I CANNOT HEEAR YOU!” 

b/c it’s apparently only okay to talk about medical stuff if HE brings it up, but he constantly gets annoyed if we talk about it at the dinner table b/c apparently we aaalways talk about it and it’s totally not cool to talk constantly about your issues, WHICH, fair enough, in certain situations. Like if you’re near strangers, or vaguely friendly friends.

However I hate to break it to him, but I have a chronic, incurable disease, my DAILY LIFE includes comments on it, and if you can’t deal with that and decide to zone out b/c you want to personally protest this decline in western civilization, you cannot then turn around and tell me you don’t know what’s going on in my life.

Read More